Yikes! Time got a way from me!

It has been WAY too long since my last post! Tommy is now 8 months old.

He is wearing size 4 diapers and size 9 month or 9-12 month clothing (some 6-12 month from Gymboree). He still has 2 teeth and is able to go from sitting to his belly. He army crawls, pulling himself along the floor by his arms with his belly on the floor.

He says mamamama, dadadada, bababababa, and many other sounds. He can give high fives, wave bye-bye, and give kisses. He drinks 3, 6oz bottles of formula a day as well as breastfeeding 2-3 times a day.

He has recently begun to sleep through the night, like for real sleeping through, not the 5+hour straight stretches that the doctors like to tell us counts. He goes to bed at 8pm and sleeps until about 5 or 6am. He is sooooooo much fun and I'm loving this stage!

I knew this day would come

The day when I would become envious of my daycare provider. Tommy gives kisses and they are so cute! At first he would give me one if I made kissy noises at him and asked for one. Now he gives them out from time to time. He'll grab my face and attack me! I love it :) Well today I dropped him at daycare and kissed him goodbye. I handed him over to Rosa, the lead teacher, and he immediately started kissing her over and over. It took all I had not to cry right then and there.

I love our daycare and I love that he loves his teachers. I just don't want him to love them more than me. I know I sound childish and ridiculous, of course he loves me, I'm his Mommy. But there is part of me that feels guilty about working. I feel guilty that given a choice, I'd probably still work. I love my job and I love going to work. I love being a mom, but I really don't think I could stay home full-time and feel fulfilled (please know that I don't judge stay-at-home moms, I truly give them so much credit, it's easier for me to work than be home all day).

I'm rambling now. Basically, I want Tommy to love me and this morning I felt replaced...

A Day in the Life

Jen over at Stay At Home {Mom}ents challenged the Bump mommies to a Day in the Life blog post. I thought, why not? Let's give it a try! So here goes. (By the way, all pics are from my iPhone and not amazing)

5:45am My alarm goes off. I was already awake because Tommy woke up at 5:30 looking for his pacifier.

6:00am I drag myself out of bed and begin to pump and do a little lesson planning.

6:30am Tommy wakes up for the day.

I get him dressed and ready for the day.

Tommy had some morning Jumperoo time while I finish getting ready for work.

7:15am All of our bags are packed and ready to go, my pump, my work bag, my lunch, and Tommy's bottles and food for daycare.

I pack and start the car,

because it's a balmy 14 degrees outside with a windchill of 3. Brrr

7:20am We're all bundled up and ready to brave the cold.

7:25am We arrive at daycare which is located in a wing of another elementary school in my district.

It's for kids of employees only and I love it!

7:35am I'm off to work. I have a very typical morning, prep for the day, meeting with my grade level team, greet my class as they enter, and a small group reading lesson.

10:00am The kids are at their special (gym day) which means time for me to pump.

I pump in a small closet in the school. It's not cozy but it locks and has an outlet!

10:40am Back to teaching!

12:05pm Lunch which means it's time to pump again.

4:45pm My work day is finally over. I return home to my sister playing with Tommy! (Bill was able to pick Tommy up from daycare)

5:45pm I nurse Tommy then he takes a short nap while we snuggle. I missed him all day!

6:15pm Tommy wakes up and Auntie JoJo feeds him some pears. Mmm

Then we play for a while.

7:30pm PJ time then nursing again before bed.

8:00pm Tommy is asleep. I make up bottles for tomorrow.

8:15pm I make a bagel with E arth Balance for dinner since I' m not super hungry.

8:20pm A little bit of American Idol then bed.

So there it is! A day in the life on Longmeadow! Nothing glamorous but I love it!

Merry Christmas!

Tommy did so well this Christmas! I was very worried that the change in his schedule would throw him off but he really did great! Saturday morning we went and saw Santa since he had been sick the previous two weekends. We actually got a great picture too! The guy taking the pictures kept trying to get a better picture because Tommy wasn't looking straight on but I loved this one!Then we went home and wrapped presents and spent time, just the three of us. After that we went to 4:30 mass with my family. It's a mass that's geared toward kids so there's lots of music and it's not super long. Tommy was awake the whole time but did really well.

After mass, we went to my uncle's house for dinner with my dad's side of the family. Tommy had a slight melt down at 7 but after some soothing, he was wide awake and happy to be passed around to my family members. Around 8:30, he was exhausted and went to sleep. We decided to go home at that point and Tommy slept pretty well that night.

Sunday morning, we opened presents at our house and Tommy had a ball ripping the wrapping paper off of the presents! Then we got dressed and went up to my parents' house and opened presents there with my sister and Granma. From there, we went up to my Granma's house to spend time with my mom's side of the family.

Then we went to Bill's mom's house where we spend a few hours with Bill's mom and her husband, Bill's dad, brother, his girlfriend, and sister. Tommy only took a few catnaps and was a little fussy at this stop but nothing too terrible.

We left Bill's moms at 5:30 and Bill went home to go to bed since he had to work at 4am on Monday and off Tommy and I went to another one of my uncles' house to spend time with my dad's side of the family again. We only stayed there until about 7:30 and brought Tommy home to get him to bed close to his normal bedtime. He went to bed very easily and slept through the night! He must have been exhausted.

Overall, the two days were wonderful. It was so nice to spend so much time with all of our family and to celebrate Tommy's first Christmas.

I hope your Christmas was wonderful as well!

Sleep

Last night we went to a graduation party for my cousin Joe. He graduated from Syracuse University this past August and his parents decided that a fun way to celebrate would be to have everyone over to watch an SU football game! The game this week didn't start until 8:00 and I was a bit worried about taking Tommy to a party so late. We usually start our little bedtime routine (clean diaper, PJs, swaddle, nurse) at 9:00 and I knew we wouldn't be home by then but figured that we won't be able to be home at bedtime every night, so let's give it a whirl when Bill would be off the next day.

Tommy did great! He hung out and let lots of my aunts and cousins hold him. He ate once and my cousin's wife, who has 2 kids, kept me company in the other room and was so funny! I brought my Udder Cover and when I was putting it on, she said, "OMG don't even worry about covering up in front of me! I mean, you can if you're uncomfortable but I don't care at all!" So, I free-boobed it!

We stayed until halftime which was slightly before 10:00. Tommy had gotten grumpy and tired and I was feeling just as tired! We got home and it took almost an hour to get Tommy fed and asleep. By then it was 11:00. I put Tommy in his bouncy chair and went to sleep, bracing myself for a possible rough night. Imagine my surprise when I woke up to a hungry baby at 4:00!!! I was in such a deep sleep that I was confused. I haven't slept that deeply in, well, a long time! I fed him and got him back to sleep and slept until 8:30! I woke up feeling great! Keep it up Tommy!

5 things

What I have learned in the 2 weeks that Tommy has been alive:

1) The baby blues are really rough on me. The changes that have taken place as well as the hormonal imbalance have been enough to really throw me. It's getting better but the cloud I was living in was a very scary place.

2) I have the best husband ever. If it wasn't for him, I don't know where I'd be.

3) A close second place tie goes to my parents and grandmother. They have been here every day whenever I need them.

4) Newborns have no schedule. Some nights Tommy will sleep and some nights he won't. We had two sleepless nights in a row this weekend and he was awake pretty much all day yesterday. Luckily, last night was a great night. He only woke up long enough to eat every 3 hours from 8-5. I'm working on keeping him awake as much as possible today to hopefully recreate that tonight.

5) My whole life is different now but that's ok. I'll get used to it. Change is very hard for me but I will be okay. This will be the most amazing thing to ever happen to me, once I get my hormones under control and can start to live my life a little bit more. I look forward to being able to take him more places. We've gone out to eat and to the grocery store, the three of us, but I haven't taken him anywhere myself yet. Of course, I haven't been able to drive until today so that's part of it. I go back to the doctor on Wednesday so I will definitely be taking him somewhere myself by then. I'm thinking about attempting a trip to Target or something tomorrow though, just to give it a try.

The Day Tommy Was Born

Introducing......
Thomas Harrison!
Born Sunday, August 7, 2011 at 9:10 am
7 pounds 10 ounces
20.5 inches long

So here's the story, on Saturday I felt crampy and just plain blah all day. I couldn't sit still and just wanted more and more things to do. I swept, dusted, arranged, rearranged, and basically drove Bill nuts all day. Finally I looked at Bill and said, "you know, we haven't put the car seat bases in yet, the baby won't come until we do that." Bill laughed and reminded me that if I gave birth without the car seat bases in, he could always come home and do it before we were released but he humored me anyway and we went out in the rain and put a base in my car.

At around 7:00, Bill went over to our friends' house to watch the Mets game and I snuggled in on the couch to watch some TV. At 10:30 I went in to bed to watch TV in there. At 11:00 I felt this very strange POP in my belly. I waited to see what was going to happen but nothing did. About 5 minutes later I decided to get up and go to the bathroom. As I stood up, fluid started running down my legs. Not a lot, about as much as peeing yourself. I made it to the bathroom and realized that I had lost my mucus plug as well. I went and laid down to see what would happen and sure enough, more came pouring out. I called Bill and told him to come home, that my water had broken. He rushed home and we called the doctor who told me to go to L&D to get checked out.

We got to the hospital around 12:15 and by that point, the contractions had started and were about 8 minutes apart. They did an internal and I was about 3-4 centimeters dilated and 100% effaced. They admitted me and offered to let me get in the tub. It was about 2 am by that point and the hot water felt great. The contractions were painful in my hips and legs and the hot water really helped me to relax. However, it only felt good for about 20 minutes then I just felt restricted since it was a standard sized tub and I couldn't really move around.

At that point, my contractions were really close together and very strong. I was having a hard time concentrating on breathing and was in a whole lot of pain. The nurse offered to give me Nubain but I didn't want to get it because it's in the same family as Morphine and when I've had that in the past, it has caused me to become extremely loopy and fall asleep even in a small dosage. I was afraid that I'd take it and not be able to push. I was open to an epidural and asked for it at 3:00. The anesthesiologist was in an emergency cesarean and wasn't able to come to me right away so I tried to labor through the contractions but they were coming so fast and so strong that I was crying and shaking.

At 3:30 the nurse told me that the anesthesiologist was finishing up in the OR and that he'd be coming by soon but told me that I'd have to be able to sit still while he gave me the epidural. She asked if I thought I could do it and I just cried harder. She left so Bill and I could discuss what to do. I told him I didn't think I could sit still. He told me he thought we should try some sort of meds and I gave in to the Nubain. The doctor checked me and I was 5 centimeters dilated so they approved both the Nubain and the epidural. The nurse gave the Nubain to me and I instantly felt limp. I didn't feel any contractions, in fact, I didn't feel anything. She had me sit up so that the anesthesiologist could start the epidural and I just slumped on her. I remember her talking to me but not being able to respond, as if I was asleep. Bill told me later that she kept checking to make sure I was breathing because I was so unresponsive.

After the epidural was in, the nurse had me lay on my side and go to sleep. She came in to have me roll over a couple of times but the relief I got from sleeping was amazing. It wasn't good, deep sleep, but it was something. I was glad because Bill got to get some sleep too.

At 6:00 they inserted a catheter and I was 8.5 - 9 centimeters dilated. They had me sit more upright so that gravity would cause the baby's head to get me to 10 centimeters.

At 7:00 I started to feel discomfort on my left side. It quickly turned into being able to feel all of the contractions on my left side. The epidural had worn off on that side. This was also the time that the nurses changed. The nurse I had all night was nice but the nurse that came on for my delivery was AMAZING. Thank you Nurse Deb!

At 7:50 they checked me and I was at 10 centimeters and ready to start pushing. The first few pushes felt amazing. It was such a relief. However, this was short lived. Soon the pushes started to hurt. I could feel the contractions and pushing was hurting my hips. They had me roll to my side and push that way. That felt better for a little bit. Then they had me switch to the other side. The nurse kept telling me I was doing a good job but I just didn't feel like my pushes were that productive. I'd start pushing and I'd finally feel like I got it right and I'd run out of breath. The nurse grabbed a blanket and tied a knot in it. She had me grab hold of one end and she held the other. Bill had one leg and a nursing student had the other (oh yeah, forgot to mention, my brother in-law's girlfriend is a nursing student on the L&D floor where I delivered and I agreed to let two of her classmates participate in the birth). When I pushed, we kind of did a tug-o-war and my pushes became MUCH more productive.

After an hour and 20 minutes of pushing, at 9:10am, Tommy was pushed out and placed on my chest. He cried almost instantly and was absolutely perfect. They cleaned him up and let me hold him and nurse him for an hour before they took him to the warmer.

I did end up needing some stitches for a third degree tear but I honestly didn't care. It was the worst pain with the best result ever. I'm totally in love with my new little guy and watching Bill with him makes me fall farther and farther in love with him.

***It took me a few days to write this out. I'll add more information about the following days in a later post.***

Weekend

Today is Bill's first Saturday off for which he did not have to use vacation time in over 7 years! He started his new job on Thursday and it seems to be going well. He has to get up super early (like 2:30 or 3:00 am) and works long days, 12-14 hours but he's only working 4 days a week and has weekends off! This makes both of us happy. So how are we spending our Saturday? We're going to the mall to buy him a suit...ugh. It will be like pulling teeth but he needs an all black suit to wear for his mom's wedding on July 30th.

The problem with buying Bill clothes is that he hates to try anything on. He prefers to buy things off the internet and rips the tags off before he puts it on to wear for the day. If it doesn't fit right he'll either wear it anyway or just donate it. It makes me CRAZY! Suits really need to be tried on and he's been made aware of this. He also hates bargain shopping. He'll find a suit that fits and he likes and will just buy it, not even looking to see if there are others that he likes that are cheaper. Basically, I go with him to keep him in line. Wish me luck with that!

Then this afternoon, he's working the Valley Field Days which is a small carnival in our neighborhood that the Valley Men's Club (of which Bill is a member) puts on every year. It's pretty cool, they have food and rides and carnival games. They bring in a couple of local bands and will have fireworks tonight. Bill and a few of his friends joined the club last year and my dad and uncles are also members. My grandfather (whom we lost last September) was a long time member and had such pride in the club.

Me? I'm going to hide my my parents' air conditioning and my mom is going to paint my toes for me since I get out of breath after just one toe!

Tomorrow is my family baby shower!!!!!!! So excited!!!!! I can't wait to see everyone, eat good food, and of course, open presents. I've been getting very anxious lately wondering what we will still need to purchase ourselves. I appreciate any gift that we are given but my nesting instincts are starting to kick in big time. I need to know what we have and what we need to buy so we can get this place baby ready. After tomorrow, I'll be a happy girl!

Enjoy your weekend!

Tomorrow's a big day

Bill starts his new job tomorrow! It's currently 10:00 and he's sleeping away next to me which is good because his alarm is going off at 3am! Yikes! It's a good thing he doesn't really require a ton of sleep! I'm probably more nervous about him starting than he is. I don't know how he manages to stay so calm and even keeled all the time, I'd be a little ball of nerves. I hope our baby is as laid back as he is!

Schools out for summer!

Yesterday was a pretty big day for our family. It was my last day of work before summer vacation! As of 2:30pm yesterday, I'm free! Well, kinda. I have to prepare 2-3 weeks of lesson plans for the beginning of the school year for my long-term substitute and I have to go into school in a week or two and let the custodians know how I would like my classroom to be set up. I'm hoping that my principal will let me know who my substitute will be so I can connect with them and discuss rules and procedures that will work for both of us.

In bigger news, Bill put in his two week notice yesterday with his current employer. We decided that this opportunity is too good to pass up. One great thing that happened, is that they told Bill they would be hiring another driver in November at which time he'd be able to go down to working 4 days a week. When he was speaking with the hiring director, they told him they decided to hire someone else now instead of waiting until November and he would have the option of working 4 or 5 days right off the bat. Bill told them that if they want him to work 5 days he would but would prefer to work 4 days. They agreed that it would be best for him to start at 4 and if he wanted to move to 5 days, he could.

He also spoke with them about me being pregnant and they told him not to worry about it. They would work something out even though he doesn't have any paid time off yet, which made me feel better.

Now some more fun news, Monday was my 27th birthday! Bill got me an iPhone earlier this month and I'm so happy with it. He also surprised me on my birthday with a promise to go shopping this weekend for baby clothes. We really haven't bought much for the baby because we're waiting to see what we get as gifts for the showers but he knows that I'm itching to get some things. We're going to go and pick out some fun stuff just from us :) My parents took us out to dinner to one of my favorite restaurants, The Coppertop Tavern (if you're ever in Syracuse, their Avocado Eggrolls are to die for!) and we had birthday cake back at their house. My Granma, parents, and sister went in on a video camera for me! I got the Canon Vixia HF R200 and I'm so excited to document our little boy's firsts!
So here we are. I'm home today and being very lazy, I feel like I can do that since it's my first day of vacation! Big changes are coming our way. Time to hold on tight!

Update to Being Selfish Post

I didn't end up going out today. My cousin emailed all of us and said they would be doing a big petition signing blitz on Thursday so we could turn in the petitions then. I called my mom and spilled my feelings to her. She reassured me that I wasn't being ridiculous and that if I didn't want to do it, I shouldn't. She said she would talk to my dad and they would take care of getting me out of it. I still feel like I'm being slightly childish but if someone else can get me out of doing this, I'm okay with it. I'll be at the fundraiser on Tuesday and I'll sign up for lots of other ways to help, I'm just not comfortable going door to door. I think that as a niece, that is more than enough. I will not feel selfish or bad about it anymore.